Thoughts from Saturday and Sunday

Yesterday, I mentioned that we had Stake Conference this last Sunday. For those of you who may not know, Stake Conference in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is where the "stake" (which is a group of local congregations who are grouped together) meets and hears from the Stake President and usually a visiting general authority. 

There is usually a Saturday night meeting for the adults, and a Sunday morning meeting for everyone. Both meetings are about two hours long. 

Sometimes the Sunday morning meeting is hard to pay attention to, especially when you have small children. This is one of the reasons that I was especially grateful for the Saturday night meeting this year. I really heard a lot of things that I needed, and I received some really good counsel that really struck me to my core. I wanted to share a few things that really helped me.

The first thing that really stuck out to me was when one of the speakers said something along the lines of, "Unwavering faith means faith in God's perfect love, not faith that our family will be healed or saved." 

That was something I had never really thought about in that way. Sometimes when bad things happen, it is really easy to doubt and wonder why our Heavenly Father won't take the trials away from us. It's sometimes hard to understand why the Lord let's bad things happen and why our prayers for relief aren't answered immediately. 

One of my sister-in-laws had struggled with a lot of health problems for the last while. We've been trying to pray and fast for her, and sometimes we wonder why this trial never seems to end. However, as I thought about what the speaker had said, the thought came to me that I didn't have enough faith. Faith isn't just telling the Lord what we want and expecting Him to do it, it's also trusting that He loves us and will do the best thing for us. Sometimes trials are what we need and if we trust in our Heavenly Father, we will become more like him as we learn to endure and have more faith and trust. Sometimes immediate healing isn't going to be the best thing for us. Sometimes we have to pass through the trials in order to become the person that we're meant to be.

One of my greatest trials lately has been my inability to have more children. We've been trying for the last 3+ years. The greatest desire of my heart is to have siblings for my son and to have a large family. However, for some reason, it isn't time yet. I am slowly learning to have patience and trust in my Heavenly Father's plan and His promises. I am learning to trust that the Lord loves me, and His plan will ultimately lead to the greatest happiness for me. 

This is Kevin as a baby. It's hard to believe that it's almost been four years!

The other thing that I really liked that was shared was when another speaker said, "If you ever think that someone you love is entangled in sin so far that Christ cannot save them, you know nothing of the Savior."

The Lord knows His children and loves each and everyone of us. He lets us make our own choices, but we should never lose hope in our brothers and sisters. Sometimes people make bad decisions, but as long as people are alive, there is always the chance that they might change. If we give up on them, we are essentially saying that we don't believe in Christ's ability to heal and change hearts. We need to keep loving, hoping, and praying for those who are lost. 

The third thing that really stood out to me was a talk given on Sunday. The speaker shared a story where we was told by a general authority to give her father a kiss and tell him that she loved him every day for a year. That seemed like a really weird thing to do, and she was frightened to do it because her father was not a physical person and had never told her that he loved her. She didn't know why she'd been asked to do it, but she did it. 

As she obeyed, her father gradually softened, and finally told her that he loved her too. Only a few weeks after the year had passed, her father passed away. She bore testimony that we needed to heed the council of our leaders, even if we don't know why they ask us to do something. I thought that was a really powerful story. 

I'm so grateful that we took the time to go to Stake Conference. Sometimes, it's hard to want to go to church on Saturday night, but a lot of the goals and inspiration that I've received this week have come from the things that I was taught over the last few days. 

I'm super stoked for General Conference this year! I can't wait to learn what the Lord wants to tell me through his servants. 

A Walk Down Memory Lane

Sometimes facebook is a wonderful thing. I went onto it, and it reminded me that today is my anniversary. Whoops.

Not that I didn't remember, I just hadn't thought about it yet this morning.

So, I was able to wish Grig a happy anniversary before he went to work. Facebook also showed me a video montage they had made celebrating our anniversary. The only problem is...it was kind of lame. All the pictures it showed were from this year.

It really should have looked something more like this:

4 Years

June 25, 2011:

I had work at 2:00, and then I worked until 8. However, at work, a kid who is the roommate of my co-worker’s fiancé came in and asked me on a date.  I had met him a couple times before, and my coworker told me that he had been wanting to ask me out since he met me.  He asked me what I was doing that night, and I told him working.  He asked me if I wanted to come over to his house afterward and do something.  I told him that would be fine.  He asked if 9:00 was okay, but then I remembered I was practicing the song I was singing with another guy on Sunday then, and so I asked him if 9:30 was okay.  He said that was fine.

He left and I was all nervous.  Work finished pretty quickly, and then I went home.  My roommate helped me get ready, then I went to my singing practice.  It was a good practice, and then I went to Crestwood for my date with Grig.  

I got there and texted him to tell him that I was there.  He came out and brought me over to the table that he had brought outside under the trees and next to the pond.  He had made stir-fry, and he served it to me. He was really sweet about it.  Then we ate and talked for the next two hours.  He is a really nice guy.  We have a lot of the same interests.  We talked about sheep and missions and such.  He said he is from Virginia.  We talked about the coolest moments of our missions, and then we talked about animals. As curfew neared, and thanked him for the evening, and gave him a (super awkward) hug.  He then walked me over to my car.  As we neared it, he asked me what I was doing the next weekend.  I told him working, but then I remembered my work schedule was in my pocket, so I was able to tell him the time.  So, next weekend we are going on another date at 7:00 on Saturday.  

I’m excited for it.  After I left I was left with the impression that he was a good guy, but now I wanted to see how he interacted with others and I wanted to do things with him.  So we are going to a Greek play and we are going to play games afterward. 

July 10, 2011:

Tonight I held hands with a boy for the first time ever!  We’ve been dating for two weeks.  I guess that’s not so long.  It was Grig.  I really kind of like him.

August 2011:

Grig is back in Virginia for the break, but we are officially boyfriend and girlfriend. I even kissed him on the cheek before he left! We skype every morning at 7:00 a.m.

September 4, 2011:

Grig came back tonight. I was nervous to see him, but it was really good. We talked about the stupidest things, but we both had similar views on them, and I decided I really like him after he left. It has been good to see him. 

A picture taken at our Halloween date

October 5, 2011:

I had kind of told Grig that I loved him via text message before work yesterday, and then hadn’t been able to see what his response was because I locked my phone in the store where I worked.  I knew however, that it would confuse him a bit.  Which it did.  I wasn’t able to respond to him most of the next day either, because I drove to Utah right after I picked my phone up from the store and was busy most of the day. When I finally got to talk to him, he said he wasn’t sure if he loved me yet, which is okay, because I also decided that in order for our relationship to progress, I needed to see him more than twice a week.

I think I’m almost ready to kiss him.

October 26, 2011:

So....today, we were out walking, and we came in because it was cold.  We were sitting at the kitchen table, and we began talking.  It went like this:

Emma: “So, we are both going to be graduated in two semesters.  After that I am going to be student teaching.”

Grig: “Yeah, beyond that I haven’t thought of things.  Besides, you know, general things.”

Emma: “Yeah, I think I’ve though about those same kind of general things too.”

Grig: “Yeah, I’ve been thinking of talking about those things with you, but I’ve been afraid I was going to scare you off.”

Emma: “I think it’s almost impossible to scare me off at this point.”

Grig: “Really?!”

Emma: “Yeah.  In fact, I was thinking that we should go check out our ring sizes at some point.”

Grig: “Do you want to go on Friday before the concert?”  

And that was that.  We planned it out, and then we went on Friday to go ring shopping.  I wasn’t feeling well at all (stomach flu), but I wanted to go anyway.  So, we went to a jeweler and got our ring sizes.  I was a 6, and Grig was a 9-9.5.  We didn’t really like anything that we saw however, so we left.  However, we started talking about other things, like receptions colors.  Then he said, “How does about February sound?”

It sounded pretty good.

October 30, 2011

Grig and I began to look at rings online.  We also started talking about honeymoon ideas.  I really love that guy.  As he was going to leave, I kind of went to kiss him, but he was so used to me ducking his kisses on the lips that he avoided my kiss.  Then, as I hugged him around the neck and buried my face in his chest with embarrassment, he said, “Oh, really!?!?!?”

I said in a muffled voice, “I meant to, but it’s scary.”

He said, “Do you want to try again?”  

He sounded kind of hopeful, and I wanted to so I said, “Maybe?”

We went outside, and I asked if anyone was around, and he said no.  So, I said, “Okay,” and then, we kissed.  

It was weird, but not as weird as I thought is was going to be.  It wasn’t earth-shattering, but as our lips brushed, it was...nice.  He kissed my face again afterward, and I said, “One’s probably enough for tonight, because it’s new.” I’m so logical sometimes, it’s ridiculous.  Our relationship works for us though, and it makes me happy.

He grinned and said, “That’s fine with me.”  Then we wished each other good night and told each other that we loved each other.  For the next 15 minutes, my lips tingled. 

October 31, 2011:

So, tonight, we went on a walk. 

Grig took off at a pretty fast pace, and I knew he was up to something, and I told him that, but I also told him that I had decided not to worry about it.  He said that made him glad.  We walked around in a big circle from my apartment and came back around to Porter Park.  As we stepped into the park and headed toward the other end, Grig said, “So, I finally finished a poem for you.”

I said, “Good!” thinking that this is what the surprise was all about.

He continued, “However, it is a tree poem, so it can only be read up in a tree.”

 

I nodded, “Okay.”  So, maybe that is weird, but since we do weird stuff all the time, it wasn’t that weird.  We like to climb trees together, okay?

Anyway, so we climbed to the top of the tree, and Grig read me his poem.

After he finished, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a little black box.  As he opened it and I saw a ring, I think my mind shut down a little bit, and I went into shock mode; which for me, means no emotion.  

“Oh, a ring,” I said, taking it out of the box and putting it on my finger.  After a couple seconds, Grig asked, “Does that mean yes?”

For a reply, I decided it was appropriate to kiss him.  (We’d had our first kiss the night before.)  As I pulled away, I became conscious of people running toward us cheering.  I was surprised to see his roommates, but since I was still in shock mode, I simply said, “Look, people.”  We climbed down from the tree, and I realized all my roommates were there too.  Everything fell into place.  Little sneaks.  They were carrying a bundle of flowers, and they handed them to me.  The ring that I was wearing wasn’t the ring that we’d picked out the night before, it was Grig’s grandma’s ring, and, surprisingly, it fit really well.  We talked to everyone for a moment, I talked to mom and dad on the phone quick, and then we got into Grig’s station wagon and drove back to my apartment, where I proceeded to call everyone I knew (at some coaching from my roommates.)  Finally, the shock wore off and I began to get giddy.

I'm getting married in February!

February 18, 2012:

Today, we were sealed for time and all eternity. The temple was amazing.  We were sealed by a man who was originally from Argentina.  He spoke five different languages, and he was really funny.  I’ve never been to a sealing where people laughed so hard.  

Probably the best moment was when he had finished the ceremony, and he said, “You may now kiss yourself.” (Due to the language barrier.)  Grig said, “I’ll kiss you,” to me, and kept it from being super awkward.  We kissed and were married.  It was kind of weird because I don’t know what I expected, but I didn’t feel any different.  I expected to feel heavier or something, but I still felt the same.  

February 25-March 11:

Our honeymoon lasted two weeks. The first week we went on a cruise to the Caribbean, and the second week we stayed in Viginia with Grig's parents. Here is one of the best moments:

Thursday, we stopped at Grand Cayman, one of the Cayman Islands.  We had an excursion called “Turtles, turtles, and more turtles.”  We had a long line to get out to the boats that would take us to the mainland, but we were entertained by one little boy who kept asking if we were going to go see “more and more turtles?  No fish?”  It was really cute.  We were led out to our little boats, and were taken to shore, where we then found our excursion group and they loaded us onto busses and took us out to the Sea Turtle Farm.  It was really neat.  We were taken on a tour of the facilities, where we were able to hold little baby turtles.  We found out if you stroke their throats, they calm right down, but if you don’t they flap their flippers and try to fly away.  They were really cute.  We went by a breeding tank and saw many different ages of turtles.  In the 18-month pen, we were allowed to catch them and pick them up.  I did so, but the turtle I caught was really pretty big.  He was at least 35-40 pounds.  I had him on the side and was stroking his throat, and he calmed down for a bit.  He kind of eyed me for a moment, and then suddenly, he struck.  With a slapping sound, his front fin hit me square in the eye.  I was blinded for a moment.  He hit me really hard.  I petted him for a few more seconds, and then I let him loose.  My eye hurt for the rest of the day.  It turned out that he had cracked my contact lens all the way through.  When we got back to the boat, I wore my glasses for nearly the remainder of the trip.  However, while we were still there, I put on the sunglasses because my eye was a big photo sensitive, and then we went snorkeling with fish and small sea turtles, which we had fun catching until we were told we weren’t supposed to do that. 

After we finished, we decided to try turtle soup (Ha ha, revenge).

March 25, 2012:

I took a pregnancy test today. A second line did show up, though faintly. We're going to take it again in a week to be sure.

Apirl 15, 2012:

I'm officially pregnant. We also got a pet snake.  He is a blizzard morph Corn Snake, and right now he’s just a baby.  We got him on April 2, and he’s now eaten two pinkies (which are baby mice.)  He’s definitely growing and maturing.  He has become better at gripping our fingers while he is exploring.  He was about a foot long when he arrived and only about an inch in diameter.  It’s a good thing that the baby mice we ordered are small too, or they would be too big for him to eat.  He’s pink right now, but when he is full grown, he will be pure white.  He will only grow to be 3-5 feet long.  He hasn’t shed his skin yet, but he is pretty comfortable with people and relaxes quickly.  

This was his first feeding. He was so little!

Toward the end of November 2012:

Kevin joined our family and our lives have been that much better ever since! We ended up with an C-section after hours and hours of labor. For that full story, go here. He was born at 8 lbs 11 oz. He was a big baby!

July 17, 2013:

For the last few months, Grig has been trying to find a full time job. Finally, we realized we'd been asking the wrong question. We had been asking, "Where should Grig work?" We were supposed to be asking, "Where should Grig go to school?" Almost immediately, we got an answer. We applied for a job there on Wednesday and they told him to come in for an interview. We drove that night to the city and stayed with my grandparents.  

The next morning, Grig applied at ICON.  Kevin and I waited out on the grass, and I kept thinking, “Well, the longer it takes, the more likely he’ll get the job.”  After about an hour and a half, I heard the sound of running, and Grig jogged up to us.  He was very excited and he said, “They asked me to come back for a safety meeting at 1:00!  I think I got the job!”  He tried to pick me up and spin me, but Kevin was in my hand in a car seat, so it didn’t work so well.  I was cautiously optimistic, not wanting to be too disappointed if it turned out to be another false hope, but I was excited for him too.  

We went home and ate, and then I drove him back. Then, Kevin and I went home and looked at apartments. We found a three bedroom apartment, pretty close to his work, for a really good price. I went and talked to the manager while Grig finished his interview. The manager said they might have an apartment available immediately. I told her I'd talk to my husband and get back to her.

Soon after (while I was reading scriptures), Grig called. He got the job! He starts work on Tuesday. We then went back, got the apartment and came back home to pack and get ready to move! Life is progressing!

We are now in our new apartment and it's awesome!

(After this point, I pretty much blogged about everything, but I will put in the highlights from the last few years.)

October 18, 2013:

Dakota (my dog from home) came to live with us! She is going to be an indoor dog now. Kevin loves having her here, and I think she likes it too!

September 19, 2014:

We got a new puppy today! We've named him Arkhon.

December 6, 2014:

After my aunt and uncle mentioned that we would probably qualify for a USDA loan, we started looking at homes. We've been trying to get pregnant for the last year and a half, but as we looked at homes, we started feeling really good about buying a home. We've been looking at lots of different houses, but we haven't found the right one yet.

December 22, 2014:

The very last home that we looked at that was in our price range was the right home. We're going to make an offer on it.

February 8, 2015:

We moved into our new house! It's so wonderful to have a backyard, and the dogs look a lot smaller here than they did in our old apartment.

July 2015:

Grig found out that his job is closing down the entire department and letting 400 employees go. He's going to be one of them. His last day of work is October 31st. We're going to have to start applying for new jobs. 

October 9, 2015:

We put Dakota down today. She got an abscess on her ribs and she's stopped eating or drinking. She can no longer get up on her own. I received a strong impression that she's happy now. That makes it okay.

November 9, 2015:

Grig started at his new job today! I think he's really going to like it here. It seems to have a much better environment, and is more employee friendly.

February 18, 2016:

We've now been married for four years. I love being a wife and a mother. It's been really fun to look through these old journal entries and share some of them with you. 

I couldn't ask for a better husband. He has made me happier than I ever thought I could be. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with this wonderful man. Happy anniversary, Grig!

I chose this picture, because you can also see the current size of our snake.
He's pretty much as old as our marriage. :)

Enduring Faith

(This post is kind of a continuation of The Right Time and Relating to Sariah. If you want to read the first two parts of this story from our life journey, feel free to do so.)

Sometimes it's really hard to wait for things.

Grig has reached the end of his probationary period at his new job. He was told that in 90 days (or possibly sooner if they were really impressed), he would be given a review, and if they decide to keep him on, he will get a raise. If they don't, we need to look for a new job.

He's been stressed about it for the last few weeks. However, after a lot of praying, we feel like he's going to keep this job, and we just have to be patient.

It's been really hard...especially now that we've passed the 90 day mark. His direct supervisor has told him that he'll put in a good word for him, and that he's pretty sure he'll get the appointment. However, we haven't heard anything from his direct boss yet.

We've tried to wait patiently and keep having faith, but some days, it's been a real struggle for both of us (usually on alternating days) to keep having faith.

Tied to this appointment are quite a few things. Back when we were praying about getting a puppy, we were told that if the puppy was still there when Grig got the raise, that we could get it. We were told that about six weeks ago.

Then, about four weeks ago, Grig felt really strongly that he was going to get the job and that we were going to get the puppy. (Thus, what I was talking about in a previous blog.)

I haven't doubted too much that he'll get the job. He's a really hard, thorough worker. He's pretty amazing and is learning a lot of new things. However, sometimes I've had a hard time believing that the puppy was still going to be there.

Then, about a week and a half ago, when my faith was really wearing thin, I looked the puppy up online where we had first found it. Six hours before I looked, the sellers posted an updated picture of the little girl that we want with a reduced price. I was surprised to find that I was floored.

Here's a picture of the little girl that we're going to get

I had been unconsciously preparing myself for the worst, and on some level I was sure that she wasn't going to be available anymore. As I felt a rush of excitement flow through me, I began to pray and thank Heavenly Father for this bolster to my faith. As I was later contemplating this miracle, in my mind I heard the thought, "Oh ye of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?"

There are other things that we've had to have enduring faith with, and it was a good reminder not to doubt. One of those things is the fact that I've been told several times through personal revelation that our next baby is coming soon. It's been really hard to wait. The Lord's timing is perfect, and I'm really learning that. I just have to keep having faith even when it's difficult.

Wanting It All

When I was younger, I received a gift card for Barnes and Nobles.

I was super excited. I have always loved books, and so it was thrilling for me to be able to purchase more of them, especially when I didn't have to use my own money.

My dad took me to Barnes and Nobles and I began to browse the books. I found three books that I really wanted, but together, they added up to more than I had on the gift card.

I could see my dad's eyes light up. I could practically see him thinking, Ah-hah! An excellent teaching moment!

He turned to me and said, "Now you have a decision to make. Which book are you going to put back?"

I looked at the three books. It was a really tough decision. I didn't want to choose only two; I wanted all of the books. Then, suddenly I remembered something.

"I have some cash in my wallet!" I exclaimed. "I can buy all of them!"

Books are awesome. Period.

My dad's face fell. I could tell that he was disappointed. That hadn't been the lesson that he had wanted me to learn. However, I was just thrilled that I didn't have to choose and that I could have everything.

I've been thinking about that experience a lot lately.

Recently, we've had to face a similar decision. There are four fairly expensive things coming up. We have felt drawn to purchase all of them, but if we buy some of them, we probably won't be able to buy others. All of them are good things.

We have felt drawn to look at some Norwegian elkhound puppies, and we've felt that if Grig gets his appointment and raise at work that we will be able to buy one. However, we've also recently found out that some of Grig's extended family is coming soon to visit his parents' in Virginia, and we want to travel there and visit them.

On top of those two things, we've also felt recently that we need to start looking at purchasing a new vehicle, one that has more room. As it is, all the people that live in our house can't really travel with us anywhere. We don't have enough room in our car.

Finally, we've been feeling that maybe the time for the next baby is going to happen soon, which is another huge expense.

A lot more than this, anyway. 

The hard thing is, I want all of these things. I'm really hoping that somehow, things are going to work out so that we can afford to pay for each of these wonderful blessings. I'm afraid though, that we're going to have to pick, and that's going to be really hard to do.

We've been praying a lot, and we are waiting to see what happens, especially with Grig's job. We've been trying to save and be frugal, but even so, currently we can barely afford any of these things.

I'm sure things will work out, I just don't know how yet. I trust in my Heavenly Father, and I know that if something is supposed to happen, that He will help it to happen. For now, we're just hoping and praying that we'll make the right decision when the time comes.

The Best and Worst of Times With a Toddler

I read a fantastic blog this morning from a friend of mine where she talked about her struggles and joys with her son during his first year of life. Here is the link if you'd like to read her post. It's fantastic: I highly recommend it.

Anyway, it got me thinking. She talked about how the baby stage wasn't her favorite stage of life, and I realized that the stage that we had just hit and nearly passed is probably my least favorite stage of babyhood.

Kevin was an awesome baby. He was nearly always cheerful, he slept through four hour chunks at night, and he immediately grasped the concept of nursing. We had a pretty peaceful babyhood.

He became mobile quite quickly, as we might have mentioned before. He was crawling at six months, and fluently walking at nine months. At the time, we were pretty proud, but that quickly led to pleased-horror as he began to get into everything.

That stage wasn't even really that bad though. Kevin has an inherent cautious streak in him. He might do something once, but he learns pretty quick when something hurts him, and he tends not to do it again. Due to that, it's been pretty easy to allow him to make some mistakes, because he usually learns from them (key word: usually).

However, this last stage has been pretty challenging. Kevin is now at the stage where he KNOWS what he wants, and he isn't able to communicate it very well. That, combined with me leaving for work with a month and his eye teeth coming in, has made for a pretty grumpy, frustrated child.

When my son would scream and scream and follow me around the house, but wouldn't want to be touched, has probably been the hardest point of motherhood for me. It was very frustrating, because I often know what he wants, but it was something I either couldn't give him, or I didn't want him to have. He couldn't understand that though, so it resulted in a temper tantrum. It didn't matter what I did, he would just stuck in the angry phase.

He's also still nursing, and that makes it difficult because I am about ready to wean him. However, with as much pain as he's been in, some days all he wants to do is nurse.

When Kevin throws a temper, it can be pretty hilarious. He'll stomp his feet and swing his arms and blurb his lips. Sometimes I have to laugh at him, because he's so cute. Of course, that can make him even more angry. Sometimes humor is our only salvation.

I don't really enjoy those times when he was behaving that way.

The other thing that he has been doing that has been frustrating is when he tries to hurt you. Somewhere he picked up pinching, biting, and hitting. We're working on those, but the more tired he is, the more he tries to lash out. He's learning, even if it can be a slow process. I think he just does't comprehend that he's hurting other people. He thinks it is some kind of game.

At the same time, it has been a glorious period. Kevin is starting to talk, and it has been thrilling to hear identifiable words come from his mouth. He can say bubble, run, and dog. One of my favorite things that I hear him say, is he will go, "He says ROOAARR (or whatever noise he just heard something make)." He'll say it a couple times if I don't react right away. That's always fun to hear.

It's amazing what he can do now!

He's an adorable baby, and we're so proud of him. Right now, he really wants to help with everything, and that has been a lot of fun. A few weeks ago, we were snapping beans, and he wanted to help. I decided to let him try. This is what happened:

He was trying really hard. He finally figured out that it didn't take that much effort and was able to help a bit. He loves to help with dishes and it's easy to keep him preoccupied while I do them. I just hand him a wooden spoon and he stirs around the water.

We usually have a great time together!

We've seen some incredible things that he has been learning, and every day he becomes an even more awesome little man. Grig is thrilled (when Kevin's not screaming at us), and as his vocabulary has improved and his tooth pain has subsided, we seem to be moving away from the screaming fits. Hooray!

We've recently discovered balloons, and he has really been enjoying those.

At the end of every evening, even when the day's been rough, he's still my sweet little boy. I will never regret having such a wonderful child. I know times might be challenging, but he is worth every frustration and stress. I wouldn't trade him for anything, including more sleep.

Everything he learns is a thrill and a delight. It will be so much fun to see where he goes next. With a kid like this, he can do anything he puts his mind to!

And he's stinking cute to boot.

So, yeah, it's been tough. Sometimes I was so frustrated that I just had to leave for a few minutes and cool down.

That doesn't mean I wouldn't do it all over again, and I probably will. We want more than one.

A lot more.

Cute Baby Dancing to Guitar Music

Cute Kevin video!

Our First Video Blog!

Our first video blog (vlog) is up!  Please follow the link below.  If you enjoy it, please like and subscribe to our youtube channel.  We will have a new vlog up every week at noon EST.  Thanks for your support!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhArn3yFgFw

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Kevin is a Lady's Man

Ever since Kevin was first born, he has been a little lady's man.  As soon as he was socially aware, he would flirt with everyone he met.  When he was smaller, women would say hello to him, and he'd tuck his little chin in, give them a 'shy' smile, and bat his eyelashes.  It was pretty adorable.

Then, when Kevin was only a few months old, he met a little girl at church.  By his own instigation, (I didn't help or encourage in any way) he reached over and grabbed her hand.  She tried to get away, but he was determined to hang on.  Soon, he was trying to hold hands with every little girl he met.

Boys, on the other hand, were meant for wrestling.  Kevin is pretty gentle with babies who are smaller than him.  In fact, he has surprised me on more than one occasion where he is crawling toward a little baby, and I jumped up to stop him from attacking them.  However, instead of trying to claw out their eyes, he settled back on his rump and just sat watching them.

When the baby's bigger though, there are no rules.  Kevin thinks they can take it.  He climbs on top of them, pushes them, steals toys from them, and generally acts like a little boy.  He's not purposefully mean, and usually boys play right back.  Sometimes, he gets a little rough with older girls, but usually they win.

At my brother's wedding the other day, he and his new wife had their first dance, and then they invited everyone else to dance with them.  While Grig and I danced together, Kevin made the rounds with one single woman after another.  He had a great time, and he helped some nice ladies feel less lonely. 

Pretty good for an eight month old.

As Kevin nears nine months, it's hard to believe that he is growing up so fast.  My aunt made the comment that now he's been outside of my stomach as long as he was inside.  Weird!  Time seemed to pass so much slower when he was inside.  I know as he grows up, we're going to have to keep an eye on him.  He's cute, and he knows it.  We don't want him breaking too many hearts....

At least, not before he turns five.

Babysitting

Yesterday, I had the distinct pleasure of babysitting our neighbors' daughter.  Kevin just loves her.  She is two, so she is at least a year older than him, and very sweet.  One of my viewers (Sarah) the other day commented that in some ways the balance of being a mom becomes easier when you have two kids.  I decided to see if she was right.

She came early in the morning, and was still sleepy.  Kevin was already awake, but she seemed like she wanted to go back to sleep (and her mom told me that she commonly sleeps until 10-11, so I turned off the light and took Kevin back to our bedroom.)  Kevin didn't think he was tired, which was a good thing because about ten minutes later I heard a quiet "Mom?"  I got up, and went out to find the little girl (who we will call Angela) standing next to the front door trying to get out.  She had two large tears running down her cheeks, and my heart broke for her.

I gathered her up in my arms and brought her to where Kevin was, we read a story.  After that, she seemed to feel better.  She asked me when her Mommy was coming, and, not being one to lie to kids, I told her that her Mom would be back in a long while.  Meanwhile, while she and Kevin played in his room (to Kevin's delight) I began to get breakfast ready.

They were pretty happy for a while, and I was thinking 'This is great!'  Then I heard a quiet "Ow.  Ow."  I went to see what was happening.  Kevin was standing behind Angela just happily pulling her hair.  She just sat there and said "ow" over and over.  Quickly, I moved Kevin away and gave him a toy to play with.  After that they were fine again.  I made scrambled eggs and toast for breakfast and then we all ate together.

After breakfast, Kevin needed a nap.  I turned on a cartoon for her to watch for a few minutes while I put him to sleep, because her mother had said that she loved watching t.v.  Only five minutes later I heard her at my door saying, "mom?"  She called me that most of the day, which was endearing, but evidently she calls everyone mom.  Luckily Kevin went to sleep quickly so I could go out and give her attention.  It was difficult for me to get anything done, because she wanted a lot of attention.  I figured it was probably because her mom had just started working and she was in a strange, unknown situation.  We had a good time.  We colored and played and made a leash for a stuffed dog that she could drag around the house.

Eventually, Kevin woke up, and then we all did things together until lunch time.  Her mom called a couple times during breaks to see how she was doing, and she told her mom she was having fun, which is always good to hear.  Then, after lunch, I put Kevin to bed again, and then I went out to find that Angela was ready for a nap.  It wasn't anything she said, but when she dumped all of the crayons out, I said, "You need a nap."

She nodded and headed for Kevin's room.  He was on my bed, so she climbed into his crib and laid down.  Then, after I hummed her a few songs, she fell quickly to sleep and slept until her Dad came to pick her up.  It was a fun experience, for both me and Kevin.  Kevin loves having friends over.  He was sad when she left.

I don't know if it was any easier to get things done with Angela around, but I did have fun making punch with her and playing with toys with both of them.  More importantly, I think Angela had a good time too.

Finding Balance

Over the past few weeks, I've been learning to be a stay-at-home mom.  For the most part, I love it!  However, it has been a new experience, and at times a very difficult one.  I've found that the most difficult part is not staying busy.  The most difficult part is finding the balance between caring for Kevin and getting chores done.

Some days, I'll be busy all day and I'll accomplish a ton!  I'll do the dishes, make meals, clean the whole house, organize boxes, made desert, serve others, do my scripture study, work on video editing, and feel really good about how I spent my time! However, I have a very grumpy baby because he didn't get the time and attention he needed.  He'll have spent the day crawling after me and seeking my attention, which I give him in short spurts, but evidently not sufficient.

Other days, I feel like I get nothing done.  Those days, I'll spend too long working on videos, reading, or Kevin and I will be watching Arturo Trejo on youtube together.  Those days I don't feel very good about how I spent my time, and I look at my house at the end of the day and wish I had done more around the house.

Then, other days, I'll spend nearly the entire day just spending time with Kevin.  We'll play with toys in his room, go outside and sit on the grass, and take two hour naps together.  On those days, I don't feel bad about how I spent my time, but I still look at my house and wish it was cleaner.

I am working on finding the balance between doing my stuff, doing homemaker/wife stuff, and taking care of Kevin.  After thinking about this difficulty for a while, I came to the conclusion that the most important thing that I can do with my time is to spend time with Kevin.  As he gets older, he can 'help' me with the household chores, and while he is taking naps now, I can get a lot done.  However, I only have a short amount of time to spend with Kevin before he grows up and leaves our home.  I want him to know that he is more important than anything else.

As I've been working on showing him that, I find that I still have time to get things done.  Kevin is unusual.  Most eight month baby are still learning to crawl.  I've even seen a few who are still working on rolling over.  However, Kevin is working on walking.  He'll now just stand in one place with nothing supporting him for a couple minutes or more.  He is very quick and can get into everything, but he also does quite well at entertaining himself.  When he is in his bedroom playing with toys, I can get a lot done, and when he wants me, he just comes crawling down the hall saying, "Aaa?  Aaa?"  That means he wants attention.  Then, we spend time together.

Grig right now is working at very early hours in the morning, and so I can get a lot of video editing, scripture reading, and blogging done before Kevin wakes up.  After that, our time together is precious.  I need to make the most of it and do my best to be a first class mom.

Swimming with Kevin

 Yesterday, we had a birthday party for my Uncle.  We enjoyed a nice swim at the local water park.  Kevin loves water.  It wasn't super warm, but he enjoyed swimming in it for a couple hours until he started to get cold. 
Grig's brother has been living with us, and he and Kevin get along great.  So, for part of the party Grig and I went down the water slides while Kevin enjoyed being with his uncle.  There were two slides.  One was very curvy and longer, and at first Grig and I wanted to slide down that one because we thought the other slide was just for kids.  However, when we got to the top, it turned out that all the kids were on the curvy slide, and the straight slide had only older kids on it.

So, after we went down once, and found out that the curvy slide was pretty slow, we went and grabbed Kevin and took him down a couple times.  He was really cute.  His hair was sticking up in all directions, and a few of the kids on the slide to a fancy to him.  One little boy called him 'fluffy-head' and patted him on the head.  Kevin loved it!  He loves other kids.

Then, we handed Kevin back to his uncle, and went down the straight slide.  It wasn't until I'd launched myself that I realized what I'd gotten into.  The straight slide was straight...with a 20 foot sheer drop.  I ended up screaming on the way down.  It was great!

So, we did it again.  Of course, we didn't bring Kevin on that one, and soon after he got cold so we had to leave for the dinner party.  We had a great time!