MM: New Beginnings

I'm so excited for 2016! I'm just sure it's going to be a great year full of awesomeness! (Sorry, we may have been watching too much Kung Fu Panda at our house.)

One thing that I've been thinking a lot about lately as I've been setting my goals is my Savior. During Christmas, the church came out with a video that asked the question, "What would life be like without a Savior?"

This is the video if you want to watch it. It made some points that I had never really thought of before.

One that is sticking out this morning is the question, "What would it be like to make a mistake and to have no hope of the mistake every being forgiven or forgotten?"

Sunday morning, when I stayed home from church because I was pretty sick, I had a dream that I was pretty angry with one of my brother-in-laws. I was being pretty rude, and in the dream I thought, "I really should apologize, but I'm still too angry!" When I woke up, I was really glad it was just a dream and had never happened. I'm not usually deliberately rude to people, and I would have felt really bad if that dream had been reality. It may have irreparably damaged my relationship with my brother-in-law forever.

In 2015 I made plenty of mistakes. I missed lots of goals, and fell short of the mark. I often did my best, but occasionally, I wasn't even trying.

I am so grateful that every new day, every new week, every new month, and every new year, we can start over. I'm so grateful for new beginnings. Every time we wake up, we can choose to do better and to try harder. We can choose to let go of the past and look forward to the future. We can do our best to repent of our mistakes and turn toward our Savior.

I'm so grateful that we can be forgiven.

I can't even imagine facing the future, knowing that I was so far removed from Heavenly Father already that there was no point in even trying. Because of Him, there is always a point. No matter who you are, what you've done, what you've been through, or the mistakes you've made, the Lord is always waiting for us to turn to Him. If we do and we truly repent, He will forgive us. We may still have to bear the consequences of our actions, but we are all His children, and He loves us very much. As long as we are trying, He will help us in the way that will be best for us.

After all, He gave us His greatest treasure, so that we all could return to live with Him again. No matter the pain that we feel, I don't think it can compare to the perfect grief and sorrow our Father felt as He watched His son suffer and die.

I know our Heavenly Father loves each of us, and our Savior came to this world so that we could return to live with Him again, as long as we choose to accept his atonement. The Lord gives us commandments because He loves us, and as we do our best, He will help us to strive toward perfection.

I know that we can all do better this year than we did last year. It IS worth it to set goals, even if previously you haven't succeeded. Set daily, weekly, and monthly goals, and you'll find that your yearly goals won't be forgotten.

Let's all do better for this new beginning in our lives!

A Broken Pane of Glass

When we found out we were moving, we decided to commemorate the event by telling Kevin he could have a fish.

Last night, we went to pick one out.

We may have gotten a little excited. In just a couple of hours, we had picked out a ten gallon tank, and everything that went with it, and spent almost $70. We almost bought the fish too, but the employees at Petsmart told us that it was a good idea to run the tank from 24-48 hours before we put the fish in so that some healthy bacteria could build up.

However, last night when we went to set up the tank, it turned out that there was a large crack across the pane of glass at the bottom of the tank.

Link to this image

We were pretty disappointed. We had been getting pretty excited about our new fish, and it was frustrating to not be able to start the process last night.

However, it kind of turned out to be a blessing. The more I thought about our purchase last night, the worse I felt. Finally, I realized we were probably being over-exuberant. We had gone to purchase one fish, a beta or a gold fish, and we had been about to purchase 3+ (much more expensive) fish with a ten gallon tank. Grig and I talked about it, and we decided to just return the ten gallon tank and purchase a much smaller tank with a single fish.

I felt better once me made that decision.

It's not that we don't have the money right now, but we are trying to save up as much as possible for things that we're going to need to buy throughout the year.

A single fish will make Kevin happy. It was just Grig and I that wanted a larger tank and cooler fish.

We can probably get one at some point, but for now, we don't need to spend so much money. Simple is often better.

If it weren't for a broken pane of glass, I think that we would have made a pretty big mistake.

Lashing Out

Sometimes it is difficult to not lash out at those who are the closest to you.

Usually it's because something else is wrong (like you're hungry or tired) and someone says something that causes just pushes the wrong button and suddenly you explode like a cat unexpectedly dipped in water.

It isn't fair to those who receive the brunt of your anger. It's not their fault that they didn't know you were in grenade mode and they just pulled the pin.

This happens to all of us, and unfortunately, family are usually the ones who end up being hurt.

For those people who know me, they'll know that for the most part, I'm a pretty calm, laid-back person. However, there are days where I am frazzled or stressed and I can be just as moody as anyone else. On those days, I usually end up feeling pretty bad.

I don't like to make other people feel bad either. Kevin should never have to cry because I lost my temper.

I don't like to be angry and I HATE confrontation. However, if I get pushed far enough, I will lash out. I like to be in control of my emotions and it drives me nuts when I do something without thinking about it first, especially if I hurt someone else's feelings.

One time in high school, a kid and I were messing around and whipping each other with apron strings (it was a cooking class). Suddenly, one of the strings hit me and it hurt! Surprised, I reacted without thinking. I punched the kid into the wall. Even as I was punching, I realized what I was doing and tried to stop. I remember quite clearly, like it was slow motion my fist moving and my mouth saying, "I'm sorryyyyyy," at the same time.

I don't punch anymore (unless I'm pregnant), but sometimes my words have the same whip-like effect when I'm inadvertently hurt. I'll say something before I mean to, and usually it is still pretty tactful, but I still feel bad because I lost control for a moment.

I hate losing control.

I just had one of those lashing out moments and it was on my mind. We've already resolved it, but I still feel bad.

I guess that's why we're here though. If we were already perfect, why would we need to be on this earth?

It's a learning journey, and we're trying to figure it out as we go.

Messing Up Dakota's Fur

So, we had an exciting weekend with lots of trips down to visit friends.

Saturday night, I came back after one of those trips to find Havelock and Grig playing games. Kevin was soon involved with the fun as well, so I decided to clip the dog again.

The lack of fur around our house since the last clipping has been incredible! We still occasionally find a long piece, but the vacuum has sucked up most of it. I think we might keep her fur this length permanently. Last time, I clipped her fur to 1/2 of an inch, and  this time I decided to go even further. I wasn't sure how short to cut it, but I found the shortest clipper guard I could find and began to shave right down the middle of her back.

That was a mistake.

It turns out that that particular guard was actually a guard for shaving, not clipping. It went right to the skin. It kept getting clogged and I decided to go a little longer. I ended up using a 3/8 inch guard instead.

So, her fur looks great now, except for a long three inch stripe down her back where the fur is shorter. It doesn't look that bad, but I still wish I hadn't done it. However, how do you learn if you don't make mistakes?

It is interesting though, that every time I look at her, my eyes first look at the shorter stripe on her back. Other people don't even notice it is there, but sometimes it's the only thing I see.

I feel like we're like that sometimes with our mistakes.

To us, they seem to be glaringly obvious and we might feel like everyone is staring at them. However, if we stand back a few feet we can either notice how small the impact truly is, or see how it has affected us positively in the long run.

Look for the good in yourself and in others. The rest of her fur looks fantastic if I can just learn to look beyond the small stripe of error. The best part is, it will grow out, and then know one will ever know that I messed up.

Except that I just posted this on the internet, so it will last forever.

Be careful what you post too.

See? You can barely see it!